Drona

Cast: Abhishek Bachchan, Priyanka Chopra, Jaya Bachchan, Kay Kay Menon
Director: Goldie Behl

Drona is a compelling modern tale of one man's journey through the labyrinths of mystic myths and legendary legacies.

As good and evil clash in this contemporary fantasy fable, a fascinating journey unfolds into a world of mythical heroes and malicious magicians with cunning curses.

It is a world, where spells can turn flesh to cold stone.

It is a world full of thrills, magic and adventures.

Directed by Goldie Behl, Drona introduces yet another superhero onto the Bollywood celluloid - Abhishek Bachchan.

According to reports, Drona is going to be even bigger and better in terms of special effects compared with Rakesh Roshan's Krrish.

Vidya may consider Shahid’s proposal

Shahid Kapoor and Vidya Balan fall in that league of Bollywood celebs who like to hide their romantic affair. But in reality the duo just doesn’t seem to get enough of each other. The two maybe trying their level best to hide their inner feelings but it’s not such an easy task to hide it from the eyes of the media personals.

Where few days ago, Vidya had uttered in a press conference that Shahid is just a very good friend to her but in another press conference, held few days later, the same actress took her relationship with Shahid a little further saying that she may consider Shahid’s proposal.

Vidya may have started expressing her true feelings but Shahid still seems to maintain a low profile.

Now this is not fare. We have been waiting and waiting and waiting and what the stars are doing for their die-hard fans? They are just hiding and hiding their connection. Well, after all it’s their personal matter.

We may have to wait a bit and see how soon the couple shares their true konnection with us. Meanwhile, we would just like to inform our hotties that “Pyaar aur Pimple kabhi chupaye nahi chupte”. True, isn’t it?

Yash Raj Films losing magic

Embarrassed by the way the audience has cold-shouldered its four recent films in a row - Yash Raj Films (YRF) is once again disappointed with the dismal performance of 'Thoda Pyaar Thoda Magic'.

Aditya Chopra, who practically produced the movie for Kunal Kohli Productions, has sought to make a scapegoat of Kohli, saying that the latter, as a director, should own up the responsibility for the new movie's box-office failure.

According to trade reports, the collections of this Saif Ali Khan-Rani Mukerji starrer have already started hovering between 30 percent and 40 percent across the country since the movie was released last Friday.

The overseas collection figure is not yet available.

Bollywood trade circles are confused at the repeated duds being ditched out by YRF, a banner which, until recently, was known for producing successful movies.

People in the trade are asking about the yardstick YRF applies to judge a film project before deciding to go ahead with it?

The question is being asked in oblique reference to the reported showdown that erupted Monday between Chopra and Kohli over the failure of 'Thoda Pyaar Thoda Magic', soon after the reports of initial collection figures started coming in.

In a meeting, while Chopra blamed Kohli for coming out with a lacklustre movie despite YRF's logistical support, Kohli sought to shirk creative responsibility for the movie's failure by seeking alibi in YRF's 'poor business judgement'.

In the midst of this dismal scenario, at least one organisation is quietly counting its blessings that it did not burn its fingers in the movie.

Though UTV is now keeping mum over it, a Bollywood trade magazine reported last week that UTV had offered Rs.620 million to YRF for world distribution rights of 'Thoda Pyaar Thoda Magic'.

The offer was reportedly rejected outright by YRF because it has its own worldwide distribution network and it could not have gone against its policy of not to sell the distribution rights of its movies to others.

In any case, YRF's vice president, production, Aashish Singh has denied that UTV had made any such an offer. On its part, UTV, too, has refused to comment on it.

But during his alleged showdown with Chopra, Kohli reportedly referred to the UTV offer indirectly, albeit as a last resort to defend himself. He is quoted as having said that, had the offer been accepted, both YRF and his production firm would at least have been able to make some 'table profits'.

Priyanka learning Bhojpuri, but why?

Bhojpuri actor Ravi Kishan has been giving lessons in Bhojpuri language to Bollywood actress Priyanka Chopra lately.

The two hit it off like a house on fire while shooting for a special episode for Zee TV's reality show 'Ek Se Badkar Ek', a release from the channel said.

Apparently, rain played spoilsport on the sets of the show hosted by Ravi.

In the meantime, the actress did not miss the opportunity to take some language lessons in host's mother tongue.

Priyanka was present on the show with co-star and beau Harman Baweja to promote their forthcoming sci-fi thriller 'Love Story 2050' releasing Friday.

I envy Abhi because he married Ash

Delhi girl Shweta Bhardwaj, who has been tagged as the 'desi Lara Croft' because of her action scenes in 'Mission Istanbul', says she is obsessed with Aishwarya Rai.

'I am obsessed with her and was very sad to know that she got married, ' said the 21-year-old, adding 'If I would have been a boy, I would have definitely married her.'

'I envy Abhishek because he has married Aishwarya. I would have said the same thing if she would have married anyone else, ' Shweta, who debuts with 'Mission Istanbul', told.

Shweta says she did not have to struggle much to get the role in director Apoorva Lakhia's macho film 'Mission Istanbul' that deals with global terrorism.

'My Nivea ad worked for me. Suniel Shetty (who is producing the film) saw me in the ad and called me for audition. I went through the normal audition process and after a few days I came to know through an SMS that I was selected for the role.'

Shweta teams up with Vivek Oberoi, Zayed Khan, Suneil and others in the film and says her role is different from others.

'Normally, in a Hindi film a girl is not seen to perform stunts and action, but I have done all that for the film. Besides, I have a bit of romance and a song is also picturised on me. So I got to do everything in the film, ' said Shweta who plays Lisa Lobo in the action thriller that was shot in Istanbul.

'Lisa Lobo is very interesting character in the film. She plays cross with Zayed and Nikitin Dheer. Zayed is playing a positive role and Nikitin is the bad guy. I am in between the two because of a mission, ' said Shweta who is all praises for the director.

'Apoorva is the best guy in town. He helped me to understand the character so well. He used to always tell me that I should always have the character of Lara Croft in mind and behave like her. In every scene, he would tell me to think how Lara would behave in such a situation, ' said Shweta.

She says her favourite Hollywood actress is Angelina Jolie, who played the athletic character of Lara Croft in 'Lara Croft Tomb Raider: The Cradle of Life'.

Shweta had not taken any formal training in martial arts. She was trained on the sets by the action directors Javed-Aejaz. She hopes once the film releases, people start recognising her for her performance.

'Right now, people do not recognise me much, only a few say this is the Nivea girl. But, once 'Mission Istanbul' releases, I hope that people recognise me better, ' said Shweta who always aspired to be an actor.

tanushree in bikini

what a gr8 cleavage

sexy riya

what is she doin

wte n wild katrina

Kapoor Bahu in the making: Deepika Padukone

With her very first film Om Shanti Om she has given Dard-e-Disco to millions of hearts. Right now undoubtedly she is the hottest face of Bollywood. TWF correspondent Sreya Basu catches up with Deepika Padukone in an exclusive tete-a-tete.

So post Om Shanti Om producers are running after you with bagful of roles and sackful of moolahs?
Yes I am getting my share of attention and quite a number of roles as well. But I have a long way to go and need to groom myself constantly to meet the expectations of my producers, directors and fans.

Don’t you think that your success was assured the moment you signed your first film opposite the box office badshah Shahrukh Khan?
I am really lucky that every thing fell in place perfectly in my very first step to Bollywood. Of course I will always remain indebted to director Farah Khan and Shahrukh for considering me for the film. But give me some credits as well (laughs).

In what ways have the film Om Shanti Om affected your private life?
I am still to register all that has happened to me post Om Shanti Om. The overnight fame, awards, millions of fan mails, interviews being taken, being called the ‘Bollywood sensation’…all these is new to me.

Despite being the daughter of badminton champ Prakash Padukone, and being a model for quite some time I was not used to so much media exposure and attention.

You too used to play badminton like your father. So why did you suddenly change the stream?
Initially I followed my father’s footsteps and started playing badminton. Most people do not know that I even played badminton at the national level. But after sometime I realised that my heart is on modelling.

But I never thought of becoming an actor at any point of my life. It was only from my second year in modelling that I started getting film offers. But I was only 18 then and decided not to jump into films till I am serious about it.

You are only 22. Don’t you miss doing normal things a girl of your age does?
I moved out of home in Bangalore to work in Mumbai at a tender age. So that naturally has made me a lot more mature than my contemporary girls. But there is a price to be paid for every thing. I do normal things and have a life outside the studios as well.

Your off-screen chemistry with Ranbir Kapoor is the most talked about affair at present. Any comments?
This is the first time I am truly in love and hence we decided not to hide our feelings from public. Being in love is the loveliest of feelings. Besides I am not a person who is frivolous in relationships.

But there were news of your multiple affairs. Even you broke off with Ranbir once before restarting your relationship!
As I told you this is the first time I am in love. Having lunch with someone doesn’t mean that I am having an affair with that person.

As for Ranbir and my relationship, initially we were good friends. But the media linked us together when we were not even sure of our feelings for each other. Before we could spend enough time together to sort out things we got busy with our debut films and hence parted.

It was only during shooting together for a flick Bachna Ae Hasenon in Australia that we got the chance to know each other and fell in love. But there is no baggage from the past, as we never parted bitterly. We started our relationship like two new people.

So when are you getting married?
Not in the next three years, at least.

Kapoor bahus are not allowed to work in films. So if asked will you quit your career for Ranbir?
It depends on the situation. Right now neither Ranbir, nor his family wants me to quit my career. So abhi se sochne ka kya fayda!

bollywood smooches

Why screen-lovers are actually getting married to each other

Television has become the happy hunting grounds for onscreen pairs to tie the knot off the screen, too. “Hiten (Tejwani) and Gauri (Pradhan) look so cool together, nah!

After all, they are a real-life couple, yaar. They have to have that special chemistry between them,” says a beaming Nivedita, 16-year-old first year junior college student.

Another friend of hers adds that she prayed for both of them to actually get married when they were acting together in Sony’s Kutumb.

So, is it the viewer’s expectations or something else that brings the onscreen lovers together and married eventually?

“This new phenomenon of screen-lovers actually getting married to each other can be attributed to long hours spent together on the sets, finding comfort in each other’s company and understanding that the professional demands better,” comments Dr Sachchidanand who has been counseling couples from different walks of life, including Tellywood.

As television today reaches giddy heights of popularity, more and more TV artistes are finding love on the sets and getting paired up probably even more than their film counterparts ever.

Varun Badola-Rajeshwari Sachdev, Poonam Narula-Manish Goyal, Hiten Tejwani-Gauri Pradhan, Mihir Mishra-Manini De and so many other ‘happily married’ TV couples first met their respective soul mates while shooting for a tele-drama together.

And they didn’t even realise when that drama slowly creped into their real life and they fell in real love.

“Manav (Gohil) and I met on the sets of Kahaani Ghar Ghar Kii. We were friends for a long time until we realised we were in love,” reveals Shweta Kwatra.

Similar are the views of Yash Tonk who says, “I met Gauri (Yadav) on the sets of Kaahin Kissii Roz. After a month of knowing each other, I realised that something special was brewing between us. So, I proposed to her, and she said ‘yes’.”

And if we go by the success ratio of such ‘relationships’, it’s far higher than its filmy counterparts.

Agreeing to the fact, actor Parmeet Sethi comments, “Being together with Archana (Puran Singh) has helped me a lot. We have that understanding between us. We have seen the pitfalls of success and failure together.

An actor’s life is very insecure. There is a lot of demand on each other. And only an actor can understand what the other is going through.

We can discuss our work together and let out our frustrations which could range from troubling co-actors to professional inconveniences and anything else.” Parmeet further grins adding, “Even if I got a second chance I would like to get married to Archana only.”

Actor-director Sachin and wife Supriya have been together for more than 20 years now. And the fire between the two is not at all lost, as seen in Nach Baliye sometime ago where they were crowned the ‘Nach Baliye Couple’.

Before that they worked in the very successful sitcom, Tu Tu Main Main, which was also very popular. Guess, viewers also like to see them sizzle on the screen and enjoy their real-life chemistry.

It’s not that only when two people share the screen as ‘lovers’ that they realise their compatibility.

As in the case of Kiran Karmarkar and Rinku Dhawan, of Kahaani Ghar Ghar Kii fame, where Kiran played brother Om Agarwal while she played his sister Chhaya when they found out that they were actually made to spend life with each other.

Similar was the situation in the Yash Tonk-Gauri Yadav relationship. Gauri was playing his sister-in-law in the show and as confessed by Gauri, “Yash surprised me by proposing to me one fine day.’’

So, the conclusion is that it’s the time spent together irrespective of the kind of character they are playing, which make two people realise that they would better be together forever.

“Having a spouse from the same field is great because there is a lot of sync between the two. So even though it is the glamour world there is a lot of trust and faith,” says Manav Gohil.

Actress Smita Bansal, who got married to director Ankush Mohla agrees to this, “For me it would have been difficult to get settled down with someone from some other profession. There are a lot of things involved like long hours, late nights and stress which only someone from this profession can understand.”

Chhavi Mittal, who is married to director Mohit Hussein, feels the same. “I do not know about other professions, but in this profession it’s always better to have someone connected to this world.

There are erratic schedules, things getting delayed, round-the-clock work, something very different from other professions, that’s why it’s always better to have someone from the same field.”

Another couple who has been together for a long time now is Rajiv Paul and Delnaaz. “We met on the sets of Parivartan, which was in 1993,” explains Delnaaz. But time seems to have only made the bond stronger.

Sarabhai V/s Sarabhai’s Roshesh, Rajesh Kumar might have been looking for a girl in the serial, but when it comes to marriage, he also prefers someone from the same profession. He is married to actress Madhavi in real- life who he says “completes him”.

Sai Deodhar-Shakti Anand met on the sets of Saara Aakash where love, and later, marriage happened. And there is also Rohit Roy and Manasi Joshi Roy and Apoorva Agnihotri and Shilpa Saklani. And the list just goes on and on and on.

But the best example of ‘quickest realisation’ about the life partner is that of Mihir Mishra and Manini De. They met on the sets of a serial and got married within days of knowing each other. One year down the line Mihir is playing loving hubby and caring father to Manini’s daughter, Dianoor, who is from her earlier marriage.

kash inviting you

I am not marrying Mr Aditya Chopra: Rani Mukherjee

Rumours insist you're marrying Mr Aditya Chopra.
Rumours can insist what they want. To me they're baseless and stupid rumours. I'm waiting for them to die a natural death. These kinds of speculations come with the territory of my work.

They're nothing but efforts to pull me down. And I can see every effort is made to downsize me. But fortunately I know the difference between constructive and destructive criticism.

Have you become wiser now?
Of course. I joined this industry when I was 17. Naturally I've grown wiser. I can see through people's motives. I'd rather work quietly and wait for my movies to release. But I can't say such rumours don't harm me. What can I do?

There was a death in your family recently?
Yes my cousin Kajol's father. Shomu Kaka was very close to my family. He was very close to my parents.

I was one of his favourite nieces. Both families were very close until my dad stopped making films and I started working.

Then a little distance came between the two families because I got busy with my own career. But at a time like this that distance dissolved. I kept remembering my childhood days with Shomu Kaka.

You play an angel in only one costume throughout Thoda Pyaar Thoda Magic?
Actually it was several dresses looking identical. I couldn't possibly wear the same dress throughout.

You love working with new directors.
Oh yes! Karan Johar, Shaad Ali and Kunal Kohli, they all did their first films with me.Now I'm doing a film with another new director Anurag Singh for Yashraj Films.

You've become a resident Yashraj heroine.
I resent that observation. I go only by the script.

If Yashraj are doing so many films that I enjoy why should I avoid them only because people might put two-and-two together and add up to five. It's wrong to say that I'm doing only Yashraj films.

Lately I did Kabhi Alvidaa Na Kehna, Babul and Saawariya which are not Yashraj films. And in fact my latest film Thoda Pyaar Thoda Magic is entirely a Kunal Kohli Production.

They've just given him their banner's name. There was no one from the Yashraj team involved at all in either Thoda Pyaar Thoda Magic or for that matter Pradeep Sarkar's Laga Chunri Mein Daag.

What's your criteria for accepting films?
I've to be excited by what I'm offered. In Kunal's film I play an angel. I've never seen anyone play an angel before. There has to be something new for me to do.

How was it working with Saif?
We may not be close friends. I can't compare my relationship with him to Shah Rukh or Aamir. With them I share a deeper bond. Saif and I share a lovely working relationship. Over the three films that we've done we've both grown as actors. We both inspire one another to give our best.

How is life treating you?
If you mean my career then unfortunately last year Laga Chunri Mein Daag, Saawariya and Tara Rum Pum didn't do as well as expected. I'm very proud of Thoda Pyaar Thoda Magic.

bollywood smooches

raima caught from above

priyanka in swimsuit

sexy payal

mona tryin to seduce

sexyy kat

aish in bikini

sexy pam

Kangana-See what kisser boy has done

Shooting for Razz2 has made Kangana Ranaut a god fearing person. Actually one can say that more than Razz 2 kisser boy Emran Hashmi is responsible in bringing this sudden change in Kangana’s nature.

Basically while shooting for the film her co-star Emraan played such a lot of scary pranks on the actress due to which she became spiritual to overcome her fears.

Kangana recently while sharing her experiences said that she comes from a family who believes in the all mighty but the pranks played by Emraan has made her more spiritual and now she never misses her morning prayers.

Apart from Raaz2 this gorgeous babe is also looking forward to Madhur Bhadarkar’s Fashion to be released this year. Then she has Raksesh Roshan’s Kites and T series Happy New Year in her kitty at her future projects.

Adding to these is also an American production companies Romeo And Juliet.

Seems God has really been extra kind towards this spiritual girl.

Vidya 'Really' Hates the booby box

Though Vidya started her career with television, she has now-a-days no interest in the booby box. And it’s how Vidya, after attaining her truly high kismet in B-town, has expressed her opinion about the most popular mass connector.

But while all the Bolly-biggies are trying to appear on small screen for their puffed up paychecks, what should be the reason behind the cool Kerala girl preferring to stay away from the TV world?

What should be the reason behind her aversion? But the actual fact is nothing so serious to make you think so gravely.

As she is too busy in films, she cannot accept shows like ‘Hum Paanch’ on television. It’s only because tele-shows demand for more and more time.

As far as commercials are concerned, Vidya is appearing on them like ever before, the difference is only now-a-days her co-stars have changed.

And ask her about reality shows on TV she will say that she has neither interest nor time to watch the reality shows that are blasts on today’s television. She likes the shows to be more vibrant and green like full of life.

And here’s not the end. Being asked about her intention to host any TV show, she reveals her utter repugnance of even appearing any of those reality shows. She funnily explains that her IQ is so sullied that she cannot even appear on SRK’s ‘Paanchvi Pass’.

If that is what we have to accept as truth then we may soon hope to see Vidya on Filmy’s “Kya Aap Paanchvi Fail Champu Hai?”. What do you say Vidya

Almost ready for an Acid Test

Much awaited film 'Acid Factory' by White Feather is on the verge of completion. Sources reveals that after two months of hectic shooting schedule in Hyderabad, 65% of the movie is completed. One month shooting schedule is still left to be done in South Africa.

Acid Factory is considered to be one of the high octane thriller movie by White Feather.

The mother of all thrillers ever made, Acid Factory has a stellar star cast starting with Fardeen Khan, Aftab Shivdasani, Dino Morea, Irrfan Khan, Danny Denzongpa, Manoj Bajpai and last but not the least, Dia Mirza.

The film has been talked about ever since its announcement and it continues making news yet once again. As already been announced, Mahindra and Mahindra's entertainment arm, Mumbai Mantra is associated with White Feather and is their first project in entertainment.

Mahindra and Mahindra has ventured into Bollywood with this strategic alliance with Acid Factory.

Shedding light on this business development, Andrey Purushottam CEO Mumbai Mantra says, "White Feather Films is one of the most consistently successful production companies in the industry today. From Kaante to Shoot Out At Lokhandwala and now Acid Factory, Sanjay and his team have created a label that attracts the best talent in the business and stands for unparalleled quality.

We could not be more proud to welcome White Feather Films into our family. We believe that Acid Factory will be a path breaker in the thriller genre. It is taut with suspense and edge of the seat tension and you will need to be a Houdini to navigate the twists and turns in the plot.

Saif discloses his rushed wedding plans with Bebo

It was just a month ago that Saif Ali Khan and Kareena Kapoor have openly said in the media that they have no plans of getting married in the future and are just concentrating on their respective careers.

But it seems the duo have a very short memory as chote nawab has again expressed his plans of tying the wedding knot with the gorgeous bebo.

Saif also said that he would be announcing his marriage date in the media pretty soon. But we aren’t confirmed regarding Kareena’s stand on the same.

We all are aware of Saif’s possessiveness towards this hot babe and maybe that’s the reason the actor looks in a hurry relating to his marriage with bebo whereas Kareena always appears to be more matured on this topic.

And why wouldn’t she be after all she is having a great time career wise and knows that being a married woman does affect your career in this glam-world of Bollywood.

Well, we would have to wait whether this Bollywood pair fi

Meet Imran's new Chachu... Salman Khan

Well, we all have known Aamir as the perfectionist whether it's acting, producing or directing films! Recently when he shot for 10 Ka Dum with his bhanja Imran, he requested Salman Khan for a mock rehearsal before playing the final game - 10 Ka Dum.

Busy with the promotions of Imran's debut film Jaane Tu Ya Jaane Na, the duo (Aamir – Imran) turned up late on the sets and came in straight for a rehearsal.

Like a true host Salman explained the format of the game and how it's played! In the knock out round (2 contestants play against each other for 5 questions, the contestant that gives the maximum right answer plays the game for 10 crores) Aamir and Imran were pitted against each other, as expected Aamir would think through his answer well before finally pulling the trigger (a knob next to their screens). However, the young lad – Imran won against mamu Aamir and excitedly played the game. Watch out for the real game between the men!

During the rehearsals Salman asked Imran "Aap Aamir ko kya bulate ho?" Imran said "Aamir mamu" Salman asked "Toh aap mujhe kya bulaoge?" Imran said "Chachu"… Salman immediately asked "Toh aap shaadi ke maamlein mein aap apne mamujaan par jayenge ya phir aapke chacha pe (pointing to himself)" all of them broke into a laugh riot and the game continued! Watching them interact, it was obvious that Aamir and Salman got along well like "house on fire" and this will sure put to rest all rumours on the Khans being at logger heads!

Dummies guide to make Ekta's Serials

With time Balaji Telefilms has become the most envied and talked-about soap churning factory.

Even though there are many pretenders to the throne, no one has been remotely as successful in dethroning the king (queen, actually, and we all know whom we are talking about) till now!

Here’s a ‘Do It Yourself’ guide to make things a little easier for aspiring serial makers. The first step is to identify the ingredients in a typical Balaji soap, decode them and then clone them.

1. The K-Title
This is the first and the foremost requirement of making a successful Balaji soap. Never mind if your title runs into several hundred letters, many repeated as in a stammer, or sounds weird, but it has to start with K.

It’s also important to register the title before anyone else (Ekta Kapoor, Karan Johar, Rakesh Roshan etc.) steals your lucky K-title.

2. Docile Bahu
Once the title is finalised, pick up a bechaari looking, suppressed and homely middleclass girl from the market.

Never mind if she is dumb and can’t act, because she doesn’t need to.

All she needs to do is, shed gallons of tears/gylcerine in every second scene. After all, she has to play a good docile woman who takes all the possible injustices in the world lying low. She will never be into revenge because she believes in the concept of forgive and forget.

3. Spineless Son
Once you have a heroine in place, you also need to get a male counterpart who would be ready to suspect her all the time and will believe everyone in the world but his heroine.

Even though he would be involved in making your female lead’s life miserable and causing her unhappiness by an untimely death or an extramarital affair, he would only be the second fiddle to your good old ideal heroine.

Being a good -looking, fair and handsome man is not a criterion. In fact, if he is middle-aged with salt-pepper hair a la Ram Kapoor and Ronit Roy, with a track record of flop films, it would add to his qualification.

4. The Vicious Vamp
If there is a hero and a heroine, a vamp is a must. Otherwise how would the scheming, plotting and planning (the staple diet of soaps) be complete?

One, who is ready to put cakes of loud makeup on her face, coloured lenses, artificial eyelashes, stylised bindis, dark kohl and eyeliner, outrageous hairdos, dark red lipstick etc, would be the perfect choice.

She, too, doesn’t need to act, but a unique style of dialogue delivery and a mind sharper than Einstein (otherwise, how would she come up with foolproof plans) is a must. For that reason, writers are a great help who would give her the best of the bitchy dialogues.

5. Weirdo Villain
Next in the list of essential ingredients for a daily soap is a very strange looking and weird male villain who would play the right hand to your always-scheming vamp.

Sporting the strangest haircut and worst wardrobe which makes him look more like a cartoon character than a human being, he would always be free (as if they have no other work) to carry out any of the evil plans of the vamps.

6. (Re)Creative Writers
Once your key players are in place, you also need someone to give them activities. That’s where your script writer comes into action.

He would be the one who would have the best mind to think of almost impossible (mostly unrealistic) twists and turns in your story. He would also back up as god, killing the characters and bringing them back from the grave/pyre whenever stuck with the story.

A writer mustn’t be a very learned person; just a layman with the most imaginative mind, would do fine.

7. Remarriages, love triangles and illegitimate children
These are the most important aspects of serial making without which the show would never be complete. Normal love triangles will have three to four persons pursuing a single lead actor.

Surprisingly, polygamy can be safely practised, which gives the required massala (never mind the law of the land). Remarriages can happen in the family, too, like a woman divorcing her husband and later remarrying his younger brother and staying in the same house, etc.

Or strangely, your heroine can keep getting married and separating from her number of love interests umpteen number of times. And if there are remarriages, can illegitimate children be far behind? Such children can remain scattered across the globe for years.

But, at a crucial juncture, they may make a comeback into their protagonist parents’ life and make them miserable. Sometimes these children’s sole purpose in life is to destroy the parents who never took care of them and they leave no stone unturned to accomplish this mission of theirs.

8. Returning from the dead
This is one formula which seems to hit a chord every time. Sometimes the person presumed dead undergoes plastic surgery (when there is requirement of changing the actor due to date issues or fights, tantrums etc) and comes back in a totally different persona. The favourite plastic surgery formula rocks!

9. Formula Director
Having completed your planning, next you need is someone to execute the so-called drama for you.

Director or the captain of the ship so to say, is not at all your captain. He is just a technician who knows how to yell, ‘Action’ and ‘Cut’ and knows how to take the same shot 3-4 times from different angles for effect.

He doesn’t even need to explain to the actors how to act because actors have their own set of expressions (one or two) which they keep rotating as per the requirement.

10. Noisy Music Director
Once your serial is written, shot and edited, you need to sex it up. And your music director would be doing this for you.

Television music director doesn’t need to be someone who has a great knowledge of music. He just needs to know where to put those ear-deafening bangs whenever some actor says some punchy lines (which is every alternate line).

That also helps to elongate the episode into a string of dramatic close-ups (plenty of makeup and glycerine tears rolling down foundation-creamed cheeks or eyes ejecting fire) with those bangs of digitalised thunder.

Your Balaji Soap Opera is ready! But it needs that 11th element to touch it: Lady Luck (read: Lady Ekta)

N.B.: Issued in interest of future television personalities.

All is well between Kareena and Harman

Lines quoting Harman as making uncharitable statements about Kareena's acting abilities had the new kid on the block shell-shocked and embarrassed.

"I'd never speak like that about anyone, least of all someone who's a senior and was gracious enough to work with me when I was just starting out. That she finally opted out of Love Story 2050 doesn't take away from the fact that we got along really well, " Harman said.

The remarks attributed to him about Kareena being 'robotic' in her performances had Harman so upset that he apparently turned asocial for a couple of days.

"Harman has never bad- mouthed anyone. That's not his upbringing. Kareena is a huge star and a friend. Who is Harman to talk like that about her?

Emotional Scorpio that he is, Harman was really disturbed, to the extent that he told his father that if this is the kind of demolition job the rivals and opponents are going to do with him he'd rather not be a star, " divulges a source very close to Harman.

Harman's agony ended on Wednesday while he was in Delhi to do an event connected with Love Story 2050. On an impulse he smsed to Kareena telling her how awful the words attributed to him about her made him feel.

Apparently Kareena who is in the US shooting for Sajid Nadiadwala's Kambhakt Ishq replied back in a long heartfelt message, saying she has been a part of the film industry long enough to know how such things work.

She apparently ended the gentle and sensitive message by assuring Harman she had no ill-feelings towards him and was looking forward to seeing his feeling.

Harman can't keep the relief and joy out of his voice. "All I'll say is, I'd never talk like that about anyone. Kareena is someone I truly admire. And if people want to spoil my relations with her, let them try. It won't work."

Bipasha: Ek Bangla Bane Nyara!!!

Bipasha just got herself another dream. The home that she always dreamt of. And she doesn't have to step out of her current home to make it come true.

No. All she has to do is dismantle demolish and reconstruct the entire top floor of the highrise in Khar where she lives.

"After I finish shooting the last of my current films I'm taking a large chunk of time off to build my home just the way I would want it to be. It would be my birthday gift to myself."

Bipasha would be traveling to remote corners of the world to get just the right colour and quality of the wood, tiles, furnishing, upholstery and other accessories.

"While I'm traveling my parents who live a stone's throw away from me will supervise the construction."

In fact Bipasha plans to move in with her parents down the road while her home gets re-constructed

The sheer impracticality of 'impulsive Basu''s dream project hits you hard. Wouldn't it make more sense to buy new land and build an entirely new place rather than break down a beautiful place?

"No no!" she demurs. "I love the space that I live in and wouldn't want to leave it for anything at the world. I agree there's nothing wrong with my home as it is.

But when it was being constructed I couldn't give it the time and attention I should have. Now I miss the specifications that I had in mind but never got around to implementing. I need to modify my space to suit my energy."

The re-construction of Bipasha's dream house begins right after the current monsoons. "I know it's going to be tough to get down to doing something so drastic in my life. But I'm forever adventurous.

And I've set a deadline—7 Jan—my birthday for all the construction guys, designers and decorators to finish and move out of my Taj Mahal. I've to set a deadline. Otherwise it could go on forever.

Interestingly Bipasha's building Muktangan on Sarojini Road in Khar, has a history of demolition and reconstruction. It used to be the location of Raakhee Gulzar's bungalow.

When she sold it and moved out (to just two building away) she had only one pre-condition. That the highrise would continue to be called Muktangan. When another Bengali actress Bipasha moved into the newly-constructed Muktangan she occupied the top floor.

I'm happy being 'Saif's ex-flame'

It's almost been a year since Italian beauty Rosa Catalono parted ways with Bollywood star Saif Ali Khan. But Rosa says she is making no effort to shed the image of being 'Saif's ex-flame' even though she has moved on in life.

'I haven't tried hard to get out of this image and I am not even trying hard at it. People need time to move out of a relationship and so do I. Right now I am happy, ' Rosa told here.

Her former boyfriend Saif, with whom she is not even on talking terms now, is currently dating actress Kareena Kapoor, but Rosa is still single.

'Love is the most powerful and beautiful experience and I would be very comfortable if I fall in love again. There are lots of special people who are special to me but right now my mom tops the list because she cooks great pizzas!' she quipped.

Rosa, who was in the capital for the music launch of her forthcoming film 'Deshdrohi', says that though she came to India to be with Saif, her mission has changed after her break-up.

'Now I want to act, and right now every day is a new learning experience for me. It's not like I am 20 and have the enthusiasm of doing everything at one time. I want to go easy and grow in Bollywood, ' she said.

The actress is foraying into Bollywood with 'Deshdrohi', where she is doing an item number 'Bewajah yun' choreographed by dance maestro Saroj Khan.

'When I heard the song, I refused to do it as it would have required a lot of Indian touch to it, which I couldn't imagine myself doing. It shows a village girl dancing.

'But Saroj Khan, who is so experienced, motivated me and it wasn't very difficult to do the song. We shot the whole song in two nights and whenever I would get tired, Saroj used to pep me up by asking me to drink Red Bull (an energy drink), ' she recalled.

She has two item numbers in her kitty right now, including one for Sunny Deol's 'Chamku' starring yesteryears actress Zeenat Aman.

'I'm only going through scripts which are in Hindi. I don't know how to speak in Hindi but I know how to sing in it. I really want to learn the language though, ' Rosa said.

The former Italian model says she is very comfortable with her life in India, though it hasn't been all that easy.

She said: 'Even though it's not my country, I don't feel alone here. It's been four years since I have been in India and I have learnt to appreciate the beautiful and spiritual part of the country.

'If people come one hour later than the decided time, I have learnt to be patient and accept the way people work here. I do have to make a lot of adjustments.'